by Annette Pinder

Kelly Marie Wofford grew up in a multigenerational household in the same house where her mother and aunts grew up. “My grandmother lived downstairs, and my mom lived upstairs.” Sadly, she was also a victim of early childhood sexual abuse. With the strong support of her mother and years of therapy, she survived, though not unscathed. Her mental illness worsened in her mid-twenties. 

“I was married, and we were raising four children. I worked and went to school full-time, and it all became too much. Simple tasks felt monumental, and in 2013, I attempted suicide and ended up at BryLin Hospital. I had to relearn how to do simple things, including just breathing, because for so long I didn’t care whether I ever woke up.”

“Step by step, like climbing a ladder, with the right tools and support, I began to find my way. After leaving BryLin, I searched for support groups, but nothing really resonated with me. All the suicide groups focused on teaching people how not to die by suicide, but I wanted to learn how to live. Knowing I needed to find my own answers, I realized that if I felt despair, many others did too. Instead of thinking my life was over when I hit rough spots, I gradually learned that those feelings don’t last forever. I found ways to get back on track, even when it felt like I had somehow taken a wrong turn. Knowing the value of reaching out for help, I also knew that I was ultimately responsible for my own decisions.” 

One of those decisions came from recognizing the therapeutic value of gardening. “I had always gardened with my grandmother. Returning to gardening was a way to reconnect with my roots. I also began journaling and doodling. I remained in therapy, diligently took my medications, and began walking more.”  

Realizing how much these activities helped her, Kelly started hosting events she called Destination Relaxation, where she taught people about intentional journaling, gardening, and more. During these events, she arranged free massages, brought in yoga instructors to lead classes, and invited a nutritionist to help people learn about healthier eating. “Since discussing mental health was so stigmatized in those days, I focused on sharing my own recovery journey with others. I wanted people to see that it was okay to take care of themselves.” Without mentioning the words mental health, that is exactly what she was teaching people.

It wasn’t long before Kelly began leading regular workshops and targeted conversations on depression, suicide, bipolar disorder, faith, and religion. She also offered a panel on Black men and mental health, caregiving, and related topics. Recognizing the challenges posed by the COVID-19 pandemic and the Tops shooting in Buffalo, Kelly came to understand the vital need to continue sharing her experiences in these workshops to promote good mental health. What she has accomplished is truly amazing.

Kelly is the founder of Front Seat Life, LLC, an organization dedicated to eliminating barriers to mental health and wellness, and the host of the Healthy Illness podcast. She recently became a DONA-trained birth doula, helping parents on Medicaid receive the birthing experience they desire and deserve. As director of the Erie County Department of Health’s Office of Health Equity, she focuses on evaluating health disparities, improving health outcomes in Erie County, and building partnerships for initiatives that help marginalized and diverse populations achieve optimal health and wellness. Her most recent initiative involves analyzing data to make tangible connections to health outcomes in Black, LGBTQ+, and rural communities. 

Due to her dedication to mental health and racial equity, Kelly was named a national LISC Rubinger Fellow and received the Martin Luther King Jr. Humanitarian Award from the City of Buffalo. As she continues to elevate the importance of health equity and mental health and to reduce the stigma of seeking support, especially in Black and Brown communities, Kelly looks back on her journey with appreciation for her mom, who always listens, and hopes to always show up for her own children in a healthy way. She says, “My greatest gift to my children is my health and healing process. I want them to be happy and healthy.”

Meanwhile, her advice to others is important: “We are all capable of enacting change – find the place where you can do that.” As she continues to share her story with survivors, caregivers, advocates, and health professionals, she constantly reminds them to “Be the Light.” Learn more about Kelly and listen to her podcast at frontseatlife.com.