Cover Model: Tara Burgess
by Annette Pinder
Tara Burgess is the Executive Director of EPIC – Every Person Influences Children, doing the work she loves. “We help parents and caregivers understand the impact stress and conflict have on children and families and how to manage both. We help them understand their feelings and emotions and so much more.”
Stressing the importance of understanding age-appropriate development in children, EPIC provides parents with the manual they wish came with their children. “Sometimes our children’s behavior reflects exactly what we should expect. If a 3-year-old has a temper tantrum, it doesn’t mean you’re a bad parent. Children feed off of our emotions. If we’re tense, they may get tense. Your young child may be experiencing big heavy emotions. Teaching them how to express those emotions is important.”
Tara explains, “We are here for expectant moms, and parents of toddlers and youth through age 18. For example, one program, ‘Strong African American Families’ helps children ages 10-14 and their caregivers develop self-awareness skills, healthy decision-making, and racial pride. ‘Ready Set Parent!’ helps parents, caregivers, and expectant parents gain confidence and comfort in learning parenting skills.”
Tara especially loves EPIC’s teen parenting program. “One of our teen moms who was shunned said that coming to our ‘Just for Teens’ program with other teen parents was transformative.” She said, “I no longer felt like I was a teen mom, I simply felt like a mom.” Tara said, “I think we all just want to be a good parent.”
Speaking of good moms, having lived through all of the stages of parenting, Tara sees many differences in raising children today that make parenting more challenging than ever. She says, “Raising kids can be rough, and social media has made parenting even harder. Substance use and mental health challenges are growing. Compounding this are the effects of the pandemic. The pandemic made the world different. Everything is so global. We can get in touch with people across the world; however, despite being connected globally, the isolation of the pandemic has lingered, and isolation isn’t good for kids, parents, or families. Our devices have become a means of escape. We aren’t as focused on good communication skills and on having difficult conversations. Sadly, we are communicating less when we feel most vulnerable, and many families don’t always know where to get the help they need.”
What is EPIC doing to address these issues and how are people learning about their programs? “We focus on outreach though social media and connections with other local community service providers, networks, mental health agencies and advocates, medical providers, pediatricians, hospitals, and birthing centers. We also post flyers, and have a presence at health fairs and community events. Our participants also help us spread the word and share information about our programs. EPIC also provides services within schools and childcare centers. One unique popular program is a Storytime hour at Canalside.”
Tara understands the importance of flexibility for and appreciation of her staff, who are all welcome to participate in EPIC’s programs. “I learned a great deal from our programs about stress management and handling conflict. Not only did our programs help with parenting, but I have found that they also help with day-to-day life.”
What are some common problems she sees? “The middle school and teen years seem to be the most challenging, when kids are trying to find a balance between wanting to strike out on their own and still needing support. Marijuana use has increased among this age group, as has mental illness and depression, especially in girls. Bullying on social media is prevalent, and there aren’t enough services available to parents with young children who have special needs. Meanwhile, many families are living paycheck to paycheck.”
How do you teach parents what’s normal and what’s not? “While we admit that we don’t have all of the answers, we offer solutions and resources. We respect that parents know their kids best and we honor the values and cultures of the families who participate. We share successes, what has worked for some, what hasn’t worked for others, what we might do differently, and help build confidence.”
Reflecting on what all of this means to her, Tara says, “I love this work. I love supporting families. Parenting is hard. When I was raising my children, I didn’t know that there were programs to support parenting. I wish I’d known then what I know now. Parenting is the most difficult and most impactful job you will ever have. More importantly, it is also the most rewarding job.”
