By Jessica Okoniewski, LMHC

‘Tis the season, and it’s time to prepare mentally for managing the abundance and chaos that the holidays often bring. While fun and festive, year-end celebrations can quickly become stressful and emotional, particularly for those who struggle with issues around food.

But why would a time that is supposed to be merry and bright bring so much disorder? The holiday season is a perfect storm of excess and encouraged indulgence. It is a break from well-established routines, filled with a profusion of social connectedness. These anxiety-provoking triggers can escalate preexisting conditions and an increased need for control and coping. For those suffering from eating disorders and associated disorders such as body dysmorphia, the holiday season can present a nightmarish challenge.

Signs of an eating disorder can include feeling stressed around food, being fearful of weight gain, experiencing guilt after eating, and skipping meals altogether. The holidays may also exacerbate body dysmorphia — a preoccupation with physical appearance and self-perceived flaws — since food and eating is typically the cornerstone for each celebratory event.

While disordered eating concerns have no simple or short-term resolution, learning strategies that help foster a healthier relationship with food is a great step toward feeling more confident when it comes time to deck the halls.

• Show yourself kindness. Self-compassion brings strength in acknowledging how you deserve to be treated and adhering to that.
• Allow yourself to know that you deserve to experience joy during the holidays. This can come in the form of consuming your favorite foods. Giving yourself unconditional permission to eat those once-a-year favorites helps halt the deprivation cycle. When you don’t feel denied, it reduces your need for control, and engaging in the vicious cycle of obsessively thinking about food.
• Be mindful of restrictive thoughts. Paying attention to use of words like “should” and “ought to” can help you develop your goal of healthier self-talk. Replace “I shouldn’t eat that pie” with “I want some pie, and I am allowed to have it.”
• Develop a holiday survival coping plan. The pressure of the holiday season increases overall day-to-day stress. Positive strategies, such as self-care, are a good way to maintain normal life routines, offering a break from the activity, and the ability to recenter.
• Maintain your boundaries. For some, family time can be plentiful during the holiday season. Focus on establishing necessary pauses from the festivities and remove yourself from conversations that do not foster your growth and mental wellbeing.
• Ask for help. The holidays are about togetherness. You should celebrate with the same people who give you support. Don’t struggle alone. Remember, that we can go faster alone, but we can go further together.

Jessica Okoniewski is a licensed mental health counselor at Spectrum Health and Human Services. Spectrum offers specialized support eating disorders and dysmorphia, as well as in maintaining your mental health during the holidays. If you feel you could benefit from professional help, contact our Central Intake Department to schedule an appointment at 716-539-5500.