By Mercedes Wilson
According to the Cleveland Clinic, perimenopause is the transitional period before menopause, when levels of estrogen start to decrease. The average age for woman entering menopause is 40-44, but it can begin as early as mid-30s or as late as mid-50s. Symptoms can last for years, and include irregular periods or skipping periods; periods heavier or lighter than usual; changes in mood like irritability, depression, or mood swings; low libido; hot flashes; night sweats; insomnia; vaginal dryness that causes discomfort during sex; and urinary urgency.
A recent New York Times article recently pointed out that over 1 billion women will experience menopause by 2025. Yet, no one really talks about perimenopause or menopause. Why is menopause a mystery, and why is the topic so taboo? And why should women suffer from these unpleasant symptoms in silence?
When I was diagnosed with stage 2 breast cancer at age 28, my doctors said I might experience early menopause. Intent on fighting for my life, I pretty much ignored everything else. So, 13 years later when I began getting my period every 2 weeks, I thought it was stress. Soon, my periods stopped completely, my muscles and joint ached, and I had memory fog, thinning hair, severe hot flashes, and night sweats. A doctor visit and subsequent blood tests confirmed I was perimenopausal.
In the past, I heard that women “go crazy” during menopause, that our moods are unbearable, and we find it difficult to accept that we can no longer bear children. I’m grateful for my doctor’s positive attitude, and understand that the changes we are undergoing at this time is due to hormone fluctuations. For me, it’s been a time to slow down, practice self-care, find a new normal with the help of our doctors, and to lean in on those who love and support us. It’s also not a time to be judged or to judge ourselves. It’s a time for our loved ones to help support us in ways that we continually support them.
After sitting down with my children and my husband and explaining what I had been experiencing to them, they agreed that everything started to make sense, and asked how they could offer their support. They began researching perimenopause and menopause, and asked questions. They are also working with me as I learn to adjust to a new normal. And the ongoing arguments about the blankets being thrown off and on again 100 times per night due to hot flashes and night sweats, are no longer an issue.
The more we speak about menopause, the more comfortable those around us will be with loving and supporting us. So, ladies, grab your neck fans and keep talking about it! And, by the way, the Menopause Society recently announced a new initiative to support workers during this life stage. Learn more about that at https://menopause.org/workplace.
Mercedes Wilson is a TV Host for WKBW Channel 7, and an author and entrepreneur. Learn more about Mercedes, check out her recipes and more, at https://mercedesewilson.com.
